These are the Top Ten Excuses for Missing Shul on Shabbos Morning. Please use them with discretion.
Excuse Number 10: The Dog ate my Shabbos Shoes
Excuse Number 9: The Cholent overpowered me and wouldn't let me leave the house
Excuse Number 8: I was meditating on a higher plane and lost track of existence
Excuse Number 7: It wasn't Shabbos in Australia
Excuse Number 6: I was kidnapped and taken to the college football, and I only just escaped (and walked back on foot)
Excuse Number 5: Aliens landed on my front lawn and demanded that I take them to my leader, so I spent Shabbos with the Rebbe
Excuse Number 4: I davened at the earlier minyan (use with caution - sometimes this excuse is not believed)
Excuse Number 3: I've become an Amshenover Chasid and it is only Tuesday for me
Excuse Number 2: The Farbrengen went on too late last night after the Tisch
And Excuse Number 1: I was so engrossed in my daf yomi that I lost track of time
(In case you missed the Tisch and the Aliens - here it is)
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